Have you ever pondered how to be content with what you have? Imagine this: it’s a smashing Saturday at home. You’ve just decluttered a cupboard and are feeling rather chipper about the weekend. To see what your mates are up to, you decide to have a nosey on Instagram.
The moment you open the app, you discover a friend has just returned from Lake Como Italy. Suddenly, your relaxing Saturday at home doesn’t seem quite as marvellous. You’re left feeling a bit, well, rubbish, as if your day has been rather dull in comparison.
Contentment can be a right old struggle in our lives, and for good reason. Between the constant barrage of adverts and the highlight reels we see on social media, it can feel impossible to be happy with what you have.
But fear not, there is hope! Let’s delve into contentment, what makes it such a tricky blighter, why we all crave it, and how it can supercharge your life for the better.
Why is It So Difficult to Be Content With What You Have?
Well, contentment essentially means being at ease with your life as it is. But that’s easier said than done, isn’t it? A whole host of factors can make it a right kerfuffle, like envying someone else’s fancy gadgets or feeling like you need all the latest things, whether you truly do or not.
Social networking, societal pressures, marketing, advertising, and comparisons are all prime examples. Any of these can lead to dissatisfaction and a loss of joy and peace of mind.
Social Networking
Social networking is a major factor that can heighten feelings of jealousy and discontent. Seeing pictures of other people’s seemingly perfect lives, new acquisitions, or parties can quickly make you feel like your own life is lacking.
The truth is, it’s likely that these individuals aren’t entirely content either. Once you realise that everyone experiences these emotions, it can be easier to manage your feelings
Societal Pressures
This pressure can manifest in unspoken guidelines we all seem to follow within our society. It could be peer pressure to work long hours, comparisons of salaries amongst colleagues, or even feeling the need to have a nicer home than your neighbours. But it goes beyond that.
Societal pressure can also push us towards trendy restaurants, specific clothing brands, and living in supposedly “up-and-coming” neighbourhoods. It’s crucial to break free from these expectations to be content with what you have. Don’t let society dictate your living situation, job, style, or any other aspect of your life.
Marketing and Advertising
We’re bombarded with adverts and marketing more than ever before. Advertisers are adept at playing on insecurities to make you feel like you need something they’re selling.
While marketing isn’t inherently bad, remember, a company’s priority is profit, not your happiness. Don’t fall for the trap of thinking your life is lacking without whatever product they’re peddling.
Comparing yourself to others is a recipe for discontent. It fuels desires for things someone else has or makes you want your life to mirror theirs. This, however, is entirely out of your control.
The Trap of Comparison
Sure, scrolling through social media and seeing friends or strangers flaunt possessions you desire can be tough. But stewing over what you don’t have won’t bring you any joy, and it can have a truly detrimental impact on your life.
The question then becomes: why settle for just being content with what you have?
Discontent and comparison can be relentless companions, whispering in our ear to chase the next best thing. Why shouldn’t we constantly strive for more? Here’s why choosing contentment over constant striving might be a better path.
The Unseen Toll of Discontent
While we might not always recognise our own discontent, its effects are undeniable. Here are some arguments against falling into the comparison trap:
Comparing is the worst
There’s one thing truly detrimental: comparison. Why? Because it’s a bottomless pit. No matter what you buy, where you travel, or where you live, there’ll always be someone with something else you crave.
Trying to keep up with the Joneses is exhausting, not to mention pointless. On reflection, you might realise you don’t actually desire what others have. In short, comparison is a tedious game with no winners.
The Illusion of Comparison
Let’s dismantle the myth of comparison. You buy something you desire, but after a few days or weeks, the thrill fades. You don’t even register having it anymore, right? You’ve set your sights on the next acquisition. It doesn’t bring lasting improvement or a sense of fulfilment. It’s a never-ending chase for an empty goal.
Furthermore, comparison hinders true happiness and fulfilment. It pushes you to constantly strive for more, chasing a materialistic high. The good news is, happiness and a meaningful life don’t hinge on accumulating possessions or living the most luxurious lifestyle.
The Power of Contentment
Here’s the thing: if you’re not actively unhappy, guess what you’ve already got? Peace of mind. You don’t constantly need to chase after more stuff to be content with what you have. Letting go of the need to acquire endlessly can ease your burden and, in turn, make you feel considerably happier. After all, isn’t that what we’re all truly striving for?
Need a bit more convincing? Jacqueline Pearce, MSEd, LMHC, of Good Therapy, suggests that contentment allows you to truly appreciate each moment, which ultimately leads to greater happiness. It can also strengthen your relationships as you focus on what you have, rather than what you lack.
10 Strategies to Be Content with What You Have
We’ve exposed the pitfalls of comparison, so let’s shift our focus to strategies that can help you overcome this behaviour. To be content with what you already have, rather than yearning for someone else’s life or possessions, is achievable with a few lifestyle tweaks.
To help you break free from negative comparison patterns, let’s explore some strategies you can experiment with. Remember, none of these are mandatory, but feel free to pick and choose what resonates with you! Here are some tips to get you started on your journey towards appreciating what you already have:
1. A Social Media Detox
There’s a reason it’s a popular tip: taking a break from social media can be incredibly helpful. Without the constant bombardment of other people’s lives, you might be surprised how quickly you stop noticing what you think you’re missing.
To embark on a social media detox, choose a specific date and time to go cold turkey. Commit to avoiding social media on your computer and delete the apps from your phone.
Whether it’s a day, a weekend, or even a week, giving yourself a temporary reprieve from the comparison trap can significantly boost your sense of contentment.
Once you’ve ditched the doomscrolling, fill the void with healthier practices that nourish your well-being. Here are some ideas:
- Crack open a good book: Dive into a captivating novel, explore a new genre, or revisit an old favourite.
- Rekindle a hobby: Dust off that guitar, get crafty, or rediscover the joy of writing.
- Connect with loved ones: Spend quality time with friends and family, fostering genuine connections.
- Remember, time is precious. Use it wisely to cultivate a richer, more fulfilling life.
2. Embrace the No-Spend Challenge
This one’s a win-win! A no-spend pledge helps you achieve financial goals while fostering contentment for what you already have. It’s a fun way to break unnecessary spending habits.
Choose a timeframe that suits you – a week, a month, or anything in between. By consciously avoiding purchases, you might find the urge for dissatisfaction starts to fade, replaced by a newfound sense of contentment.
3. Cultivate Gratitude Through Self-Appreciation
Gratitude journaling is a powerful tool for fostering contentment. Write down thank you notes or letters to yourself, expressing appreciation for the things and people in your life, big or small. This practice reminds you of all the good things you already have, promoting a sense of abundance.
Keep these notes handy: stick them on your computer, tuck them into your regular notebook, or scatter them around your house as positive reminders. Whenever you feel a dip towards discontentment, these prompts will gently nudge you back towards gratitude.
4. Declutter for Contentment
Sometimes, simply becoming aware of how much we already own can spark a sense of contentment. After all, the last thing we want while decluttering is to create more clutter! Decluttering can significantly boost your content with what you have.
Start with a space that causes you stress, perhaps overflowing cupboards or a chaotic wardrobe. Feeling ambitious? Tackle a whole room! Once you’ve decluttered and organised the chosen area to your satisfaction, move on to the next.
5. Utilise What You Already Have
Consider comparable items you currently own or find new uses for what you already have before making a purchase the next time you’re in the market for something new.
For instance, painting your current dining table would make it appear brand new even when you really want a new one. Alternatively, if a trip is out of your budget, you can take a staycation at home the following weekend. Utilise your resources and develop an appreciation for creativity.
Furthermore, you might discover that the happiness, quality time with family, or tranquil environment you were seeking isn’t something that can be purchased. It’s something that you are already familiar with. You can be content with what you have and be equally happy as everyone else if you put some thought and imagination into it.
6. Express Your Gratitude to Your Loved Ones and Friends
Show others that you are concerned! Spend some time letting each person know how much you value and are grateful for their presence in your life.
Instead of letting discontent cause you to miss out on wonderful memories and times spent with loved ones, find methods to enjoy the present. Spend time with the people you care about by going to the park, seeing a movie, or just having fun.
7. Invest for the Future Rather Than Make Purchases
Spending excessive amounts of money on things we don’t really need or want can result from discontent. Save your money for something you truly care about in the future rather than squandering it now. Start with emergency savings, retirement money, or even something enjoyable like a handbag or weekend getaway.
The important thing is that you start to consider your future desires rather than your immediate desires. If you’re feeling very frugal, consider saving money by stuffing it into a glass jar.
Alternatively, open a savings account with a designated purpose. Set aside a specific amount of money every month, or save more anytime you begin to feel unsatisfied whichever suits you the most.
8. Put Together a Capsule Outfit
A capsule wardrobe consists of basic pieces that complement each other. Use mostly neutral colours that go well together and only clothes that you already own. After that, take your time choosing your clothes. You can learn a lot about being content with what you have by creating a capsule wardrobe.
Keeping a capsule wardrobe will prevent you from feeling compelled to purchase items in line with every emerging trend. If you wear things in flattering combinations, you won’t feel like you need to buy things all the time.
9. Modify the Conversation
Pay attention to the words you use if you want to work on being content with what you have. Phrases like “I wish I had” or “once I get the (promotion, house, car)” are typically indicative of discontent. Setting objectives is a good thing, but talking about discontent will only make you sad. Acquire the ability to distinguish between both.
Instead, speak positively and with content. “I’m grateful for” or “I’m happy for that person” are good starting points. And you can remain satisfied and yet discuss your objectives. Saying things like “I’m working hard to get a promotion,” or “Next year I hope to move to (city),” is acceptable as long as you’re content with where you are.
10. Consider Your Own Desires Rather Than Those of Others
Have you taken a moment to consider your true desires? Social media and societal pressures will occasionally try to tell you what to desire before you even make a decision. The next time you feel jealous, consider why, in order to prevent this. Are you really interested in what that person has?
For instance, you can become unhappy if you discover that one of your friends lives in a larger, more opulent home than you. If you take a moment to reflect, though, you could decide that a house that size isn’t something you really want to clean or decorate. You can therefore be content with what you already have.
You are free to choose what you want without outside influence once you are aware of what you don’t want. Whether your dream is to launch a company, finish your master’s degree, or travel to every nation, you can start pursuing your own objectives. Make your efforts only towards achieving your goals, disregarding the purchases or actions of others.
When you can be content with what you have, life will get better. Envy and discontent can be permanently eliminated by living and appreciating your own life. You’ll be so much happier, more appreciative, less resentful, and possibly even have a positive attitude on life.
Use these strategies to assist you arrive at being content with what you have. When you’re focused on living your own life, comparisons tend to fade away really quickly, which may surprise you!
